confused and in love at my baby at the same time

Went back to my OB for my checkup and I just found out that I have  separation anxiety. I’m just not comfortable leaving my baby at home. I feel like crying and I want to tell hubby that I want to go home already. I am searching the net if this just a recent-mommy thing, I guess it’s not as uncommon as I think it is.

Anyway, yesterday night, I had the most harrowing experience ever since being a mom. Adriana is crying non-stop for more than 3 hours. I’m guessing she is hungry but she keeps on refusing my breasts – nipple confusion, I know. 😦

I felt confused and at loss. Confused because I have overflowing love for my baby but yesterday, I felt like she was a stranger to me or rather I was a stranger to her. She kept on refusing my breasts and doesn’t want to drink from it. I keep on shoving my breasts to her mouth but she keeps on turning her head and cries like you never imagine a baby can cry. It hurts when your baby does that.

By morning, my baby is as calm as an angel. I just want to kiss her and hug her all the time.

It’s really true that motherhood will test the patience of even the most patient person ever. Here’s to hoping that I can survive intact from all those late night crying and nipple rejections.

And oh, I just like to give a shout out to those working moms out there. I can’t imagine leaving my baby for more than 3 hours 😦


About alenski

I am a new mom and I'll do everything for my little angel.
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